Improved Recount term 4

Kia ora

Here is the recount I wrote  for an Asttle writing test in Week 4.  Our teacher marked all our recounts and gave us our scores. Mine came out at Level 2a which is just below the end of year standard for Year Five. I got the best marks for sentence structure and punctuation, and the lowest marks for spelling. 

Then we helped each other improve them by reading each other’s recount and talking about them. We also used Revision Assistant to help edit each other’s story and Mrs B added some notes as well. Everyone in our room likes Revision Assistant because it’s easy to understand the marks/ notes that it puts on your writing and so it’s quick for us to go and do the fix-ups. I hope someone will give me some feedback.

Ka kite ano

On Sunday morning I yelled “Get up! Get up Papa! We need to check our nets because we left them overnight.” So we drove off to go get them.

“Woohoo!!!”  I yelled.We went drifting around the corner. EEER!!! My papa slammed on the brakes.

We got there went straight to the first net and There was about 20 eels in this net. When we pulled in the net we saw some holes out of which they could escape. We crossed the river to get the other net and there were no holes in that net. There were about 30 eels in this net. We got one humongous eel it was the  biggest eel and it was as fat as a baby hippo.

We got home gutted the eels and then salted and soy sauced them ready to put them in the smoke house.

It was pretty good. We got about 50 eels. I was happy about that. The eels tasted nice.